Well, I wasn’t expecting to find this. Under normal thrifting-adventure circumstances, my eyes would glaze over and I’d run from sports equipment like so much Kryptonite (my inflated ego tells me that I am indeed the Superman of whatever this hobby is, though Lord knows I’m not). I mean, I love baseball (and football), but aside from vintage mugs and glasses, I generally have little use for sports, um, stuff. However, the particular trip to Goodwill that yielded this find was not exactly fruitful; indeed, I was batting zero (see what I did there?! Haw haw!), and with each passing second was becoming increasingly more distressed at my lack of scores (see what I did again?! Haw haw HAW!). Which is why I even gave a freakin’ baseball bat more than a passing glance. I’m glad I did though, because as unlikely as it may seem, it ended up becoming an interesting Northeast Ohio TV-related find. Plus, I got to menacingly walk to the car holding the bat in one hand, like I was just itching to beat some hoodlum down. Made me feel like a big man.
It’s a Louisville Slugger bat. I know little to nothing about sports equipment, but I know Louisville Slugger is quality stuff. So, that was neat. But, it was gonna take more than that fact to get me to part with $5. I mean, this was a hot five-buck-bill, man! You want me to part with that kinda dough, you really gotta show me sumpin’!
Here’s the sumpin’: It’s been branded with WUAB TV-43 and Cleveland Indians graphics! Cool winnins! I won’t pretend that they’re in good shape, though; this thing was obviously used quite a bit, or at least left outside for long periods of time. That’s another thing about sports equipment that really makes me shy away from it: I’m not that big of a germophobe, but anything can happen to this stuff when it’s outside. Kids smashing dog poop with it, canines pissing on it, birds crappin’ on it, children using it to smack around the dead squirrel laying in the backyard, etc. etc. Basically, all of my bizarre mental scenarios regarding “outside things” end with dead animals or some kind of animal’s bodily function winding up all over whatever I’m considering buying. Hey, I once bought some CDs that a cat had, erm, ‘gotten to’ at some point (unbeknownst to me until I got home, of course), so I’m allowed to have my suspicions. Once bitten twice shy or something along those lines.
But, my bat doesn’t smell like anything dead or any kind of excrement, so that’s a good thing. And make no mistake, I really was sniffing this thing; a bigger creep you’ll not soon find, hombre.
Besides the WUAB and Indians logos, there’s another logo that time has rendered incomprehensible. The general shape of it makes me think it may be Burger King. I know BK did some Indians promotions in the past, so who knows. Of course, the WUAB connection is that 43 broadcast the Indians games at the time. Needless to say, I wish the graphics were in better shape, but since I don’t expect to come across another one of these bats anytime soon, I’ll have to be satisfied with what I got.
The graphics may be severely worn, but the bat itself seems to be in fairly solid shape. However, as previously stated, I know precious little about this sort of thing, so take that what for it is. That said, I can’t find anything about the bat online. Where did it come from? Was it sold at the ballpark as a souvenir? Was it a special WUAB promotion? Was it given to kids on “Bat Day?” It does seem like it’s a bit lighter, so maybe it was indeed intended for the lil’ baby childrens. I don’t even know what year this thing hails from. The WUAB logo is the same one used around the early-to-mid-1980’s so I can kinda sorta narrow the time-frame to around then, but beyond that…?
Since I wasn’t prepared to add this sort of item to my collection, I was initially perplexed as to where exactly to put it. But, after many seconds of deliberation, I think the best place for it is in a position where it can be ready to protect my Laserdisc players and, just out of camera range, the Sears Video Arcade II I never play, should the circumstance ever arise. Plus, it makes me look vaguely athletic, which is ostensibly a good thing.
(This post has taught that it’s extremely difficult to get satisfactory pictures of a baseball bat, by the way.)