Monthly Archives: January 2014

An Interview With Marty “Superhost” Sullivan.

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Ah, Superhost. Portrayed by Marty Sullivan, he was a bonafide institution on Northeast Ohio television for 20 years. From 1969 to 1989, Mr. Sullivan hosted Saturday afternoons on WUAB Channel 43. Through his program, untold numbers of kids were introduced to The Three Stooges, as well as classic (and maybe some not-so-classic) horror and sci-fi movies. Even those viewers already familiar with the films found an additional reason to watch in Superhost himself. Indeed, my very first glimpse of the Northeast Ohio movie-hosting tradition was through Superhost, specifically the promos featuring him doing “The Curly Shuffle” that aired during the kids’ programming on WUAB. Even if I was a bit too young to “get it” then, the memories of Supe stayed with me, and found a natural place in my heart when I was old enough to “get it.” And the show has really held up. Unlike some similar programs that show their age or are otherwise “had to be there” viewing, I find myself constantly and consistently laughing out loud at Supe.

I recently had the honor and privilege of interviewing Mr. Sullivan for this blog. He couldn’t have been more gracious with his time or more forthcoming with his stories. A true class-act all the way (it’s obvious why he was and is so beloved by Northeast Ohioans). Here, now, is my interview with Marty “Superhost” Sullivan.

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Me: First off, thanks again for allowing me to talk with you.

Marty Sullivan: No problem!

Me: It is a huge, huge thrill for me.

MS: Well I’m glad! Thank you!

Me: When did you first become interested in becoming a broadcaster?

MS: Oh my God, that’s a question! I was always interested in radio as a youngster. It was the year of The Lone Ranger and all those dramatic radio shows. Inner Sanctum and Lights Out and all those radio shows. And I used to listen to those as a child, and the interest just kept on. I don’t know when I actually wanted to become an announcer, but I think it was not until I was in college. I worked in a little theater group in college, and I didn’t have a lot of nerve to get up in front of people! So…

Me: [Laughs] So, who would you say were your early influences that sort of pushed you into becoming a broadcaster?

MS: I took some psychological tests when I graduated from high school, and they indicated I was not really sure of myself. I was kind of a quiet kid, and they advised taking some public speaking courses to build-up my self-confidence. So, I did. I took a course that was run in Detroit by two local broadcasters, two big time announcers in Detroit. I went to their school and I learned about radio broadcasting from them. So that’s how that happened.

Me: When did you first actually go into broadcasting?

MS: Actually, I finished the broadcasting course, and I was going, also at the same time, to the Meinzinger School Of Commercial Art in Detroit. I had some ability as a draftsman, so I was taking a course in commercial art. And the commercial arts school went belly-up! I had only been there through the latter part of the summer, and one day I went in to attend class, and there was a note on the board that said “Don’t bother coming in anymore!” So, then I didn’t know what to do, so I figured I’d finish the broadcasting course, “maybe there’s somebody that needs a pronouncer!” Somebody at the school told me that this little station down in Indiana might be needing a disc jockey or announcer or something. So, I sent them a tape, and they said “Come on down! You’re hired!” And that’s actually how I got started in broadcasting, it was a little station in Peru, Indiana, WARU, a little AM station. But it was just a daytime station. At night they had to go off the air, because radio waves traveled further at night. So they went off the air at local sunset.

Me: So how did it end up that you came to Northeast Ohio?

MS: I went back and got into Detroit radio, and had a couple stints there. I was working for WJR, the Goodwill station in Detroit at that point in time. And, I got myself fired at WJR! Then one of the chaps I used to work with at WJR, one of the newsmen, had moved to Cleveland as a newsman. And he called me up and asked me if I wanted to be a newsman down in Cleveland. So, I figured “Well, sure, why not!”

Me: Was that WUAB?

MS: WGAR in Cleveland was where I first started as a newsman. Then George left, the guy who hired me in, was news director. He was unhappy there, so he moved to New York, got a job in New York as a newsman. I think it was WNEW New York. And I thought since he left, he was the one who hired me in, I’d be thrown out! Then, I was hired into an advertising agency in Cleveland. It was Ritchie and Sattler, and they specialized in industrial advertising. One of their clients was RicWil, it was a pipe making company down in Akron, I think it was. I stayed with them about a year, but then that’s when WUAB opened up. Somebody told me it was open. So, again, I was canned at the advertising agency, because they knew of a chap who had a client, a big electronics company, that they wanted to get in the office. So they moved me out to move him in, along with his client. That’s when I got in touch with WUAB, the program manager; sent him a tape and he told me to come on in. Put me to work!

Me: You started there as a newsman?

MS: Announcer, newsman, audio man, camera man…

Me: [Laughs] So pretty much everything!

MS: And nighttime switchboard operator!

Me: So how did it come about that they wanted you to host a Saturday afternoon show? What were the origins of Superhost?

MS: This one I know! I’ve recited it several times! I was doing what they call floor directing. That’s where I was wearing a headset, and was talking to the director in the control room. I was out in the studio to impart those directions to people out there. It was kind of like a Dick Clark Show, called Big Beat Dance Party, and they were taping it on a Saturday. I was floor directing, and The Four Lads were coming in to sing “Standing On a Corner.” So, naturally we had a ‘corner’ set there. And they asked me to stand in four different places so they could adjust the lighting, since the Lads weren’t there yet, we were just getting ready. So I’m standing there and the director is shouting at me over the headsets that I’m unzipped! I must have looked very uncomfortable trying to cover up THAT! So Ted Bays, the program manager, happened to be in the control room when all this is going on, and everybody in the control room is laughing uproariously; I can hear them on the headset! After the show was over, Ted Bays came up and asked me if I wanted to come up with an idea for a show for a character to host a movie. And, that’s what I came up with!

Me: Was it a runaway hit? Did you know what early reactions were or how popular it was at the start?

MS: [Laughs] Yeah, it wasn’t popular at all! It took quite awhile for people to discover – back in those days there weren’t any UHF television stations, very few of them. It was TransAmerica that put it on the air, they were taking a big chance with the new technology, the ultra high-frequency television station. Their signal was a little tricky to get around, it didn’t have the coverage that the VHF stations had. So it took awhile for people to discover UHF. And when they did, they discovered the show! A lot of kids liked watching the old science fiction movies on Saturdays.

Me: You said it wasn’t very popular at first. Did WUAB give you any static? Were they complaining?

MS: No, they were selling commercials, so they were relatively happy with it. They were always after me for more ratings, but I did the best I could. But, it just took awhile for people to discover where it was and the fact they liked these old movies!

Me: Did you ever hear from viewers that just didn’t “get it” or that were complaining?

MS: I was doing a public appearance at a store in Cleveland, at that time called Uncle Bill’s. It was like a Home Depot kind of store. So I did a public appearance there signing autographs, and I’m all dressed up in my little super suit, and I’m in the middle of the store. Kids are coming up, signing autographs, and a couple young-ish men, like in their 20’s or so, were walking by. The one guy pokes the other guy, points to me and says “Oh look, there’s the guy that’s on the TV!” and the other guy looked back and said to his friend “Oh, that a-hole!” So that put everything in perspective!

Me: [Laughing] Did you say anything? I don’t know if I’d know what to say in a situation like that!

MS: Well they weren’t talking to me, I just overheard them!

Me: I’d assume that sort of thing was kept to a minimum?

MS: Yeah, that was the only time I ever heard anybody overtly describe me that way!

Me: You showed a lot of the science fiction and horror movies, did you have a favorite? I know the station probably controlled what you played, but…?

MS: They did, the program manager picked all the movies – usually on the basis of how cheap they were! Let me see, there were a lot of good movies. Forbidden Planet, I liked, where The Krell were the monsters. Who was in that? I can’t think of the name of the man now. The comic actor, did a lot of comedy. Anne Francis was the girl in that, I remember her name! Walter Pidgeon was her father in that movie. It was a good movie.

Me: Are there any other films that you particularly like?

MS: There’s been several new ones that I like. One was called The Red Planet. I like Alien and all the modern films, I like them a lot. In fact, I signed up for Netflix so I could watch them without all the commercials!

Me: How about skits? Everyone knows you’ve done some pretty famous skits like “Convoy” and “The Moronic Woman.” Are there any favorite skits you have?

MS: Well, I remember a little background story: I decided to do a little take-off on The Bionic Woman, and I was talking about it to some of the people at the station at night, and one of the cleaning ladies came up with the idea of the long arms. That was the first one, where The Moronic Woman grabbed the bumper and the guy took off in the car and stretched her arms out 20 feet! That was thought up by one of the cleaning ladies!

Me: Would you say that’s your favorite?

MS: I think my favorite bit was The Moronic Woman where she kicked the football and her leg went up over the goal posts!

Me: I was watching the “Convoy” skit not too long ago, and the part I found funniest the last time I watched it was the three guys kicking their feet during the chorus.

MS: The one guy there, I think he used to smoke a little funny…

Me: [Big Laugh]

MS: He was like a half-beat off the whole dance routine! Next time you watch it see if he isn’t a little off! [Those guys] all became directors, ultimately. Where they wound up, I have no idea, but they all became directors. The guy that directed the pilot show I did, the station wanted to see a pilot show before they decided whether to put me on the air or not. So we got together one Sunday night and taped it, and the guy was a man named Harry Kooperstein. Harry went on to Hollywood and became one of the biggest directors out there. He directed a lot of the Los Angeles symphony broadcasts and also directed all the Christmas parades out there. So, Harry became a big deal in Hollywood.

Me: Is his name where you got the alter-ego name [Henry Brookerstein] for Superhost?

MS: Well, we had three directors at channel 43: Henry Briggs was one, Harry Kooperstein was the other, and Brooke Spectorsky was the third.

Me: So you just put them all together?

MS: Mashed ‘em all together!

Me: I know you did a couple Big Chuck & Hoolihan/Lil’ John skits. Were you guys friends off-camera?

MS: Oh yeah, they were good guys. We weren’t direct-competition, anyway. They were on Friday night and I wasn’t on till Saturday, so we weren’t at loggerheads. And they’re nice guys; they came over to the station once to do a commercial for their show because it was too busy there at [WJW] 8. And they stole my phone booth as a gag!

Me: [Laughing]

MS: And I think it’s probably still over at channel 8!

Me: Did you ever do commercials for companies/products?

MS: I did one for some boat company in Cleveland. They sold fishing boats and pleasure boats, and I did a few for that guy, but I don’t remember what the name of the outfit was.

Me: Were you in costume?

MS: I’m not sure now. It’s been so long ago! I think I was, but I don’t have a clear memory of it.

Me: Okay, maybe not necessarily a “favorite” moment, but do you have a most-memorable moment from the whole 20 year run?

MS: Well, probably when I finished the last show. Taping the last show, I thought I’d get emotional, and I was doing pretty good. And then we were breaking down the set and I’m walking out and one of the crew members said “How you doing?” and that kinda got to me. Then it all came to me in a rush: this was the end.

Me: I came around sort of at the end of Superhost, I was just a little guy at the end. And actually, the most endearing memory for me, because they would play the commercial during all the cartoons I’d watch, it’s the promo of you doing “The Curly Shuffle.”

MS: Oh, yeah!

Me: I still have it on my old tapes from when I was little, but I guess that was really my introduction to the whole Northeast Ohio movie hosting thing.

MS: Well that’s great, I’m glad you liked it! We always had fun doing the commercials. I remember right in the middle of that I had to go and have triple bypass surgery.

Me: Oh geez!

MS: St. Vincent’s. And of course it took awhile to recupe from that. I remember the first show I did [after that], I made up a great big band-aid out of colored paper and pasted it on me! Everybody was fussing about the surgery, so I had to put them at ease!

Me: The show’s timeslot: The most famous was an hour of Three Stooges and two movies?

MS: Yeah, originally it was two movies and some other stuff. Sometimes it was Stooges, sometimes it was Superman, the live-action Superman with Steve Reeves or George Reeves or whatever his name was. It changed around over the years, but for the first, I don’t know, 7 or 8 years, 10 years, it was like two movies and short subjects on Saturday.

Me: I read that you ended up showing the Adam West Batman series at one point.

MS: Yeah.

[NOTE: And so, a new video hunting obsession is born. Recordings of Adam West Batman hosted by Superhost are now waaaaay at the top of my “really, really want” list!]

Me: What did you think of those programming changes?

MS: Well, ultimately, when my ratings started sagging, just because people were used to it and all the little kids who used to watch grew up and got a job. They couldn’t spend all day watching the movies! So, that was fine with me.

Me: Was it your decision to end Superhost, or was it WUAB’s?

MS: Well, it was kinda mutual in a sense. We had a new station manager who was brought in from the sales department, and he decided that he‘d do away with Superhost because he could do better with putting wrestling on Saturday. So that was what ultimately caused the end of Supe. And I had told the new program manager that I had rather just kill of Superhost than have him die a slow miserable death. So, he agreed.

Me: I was watching that last one not too long ago and it really does have a, I’d guess you’d say, bittersweet ending. You know how it says “Good Luck, Supe!” at the end.

MS: Yeah. That was the director, his name was Paul Nickerson, who added Thanks” or “Goodbye” or “Good Luck” or whatever it was they put on. I haven’t watched that show in a long time. I’ve got it somewhere on a disc, I think.

Me: what did you do after Superhost ended? You stayed in broadcasting for a few more years, right?

MS: I did, yeah. I stayed at channel 43 still doing the announcing. It was about that time that they put in a whole evening news thing at 10 O’clock on channel 43. I was the only newsman they had for years; I would just change out of the super suit and go out there and do 5 minutes of headline news at 10 O‘clock at night. But then they decided to put in a news department – that took about 35 people to replace me! So that made me kinda smile!

Me: You retired in, 1993, was it?

MS: Right, 1993 and moved over here to Oregon.

Me: Can you still do the Superhost voice?

MS: Yeah, sure! “Hello dere! This is Supe!”

Me: [Laughing] Can you do “Gimme dat shoe?”

MS: Sure! “Gimme dat shoe, y’know!”

[NOTE: I don’t mind telling you I was dying with laughter at this point.]

Me: Would you ever consider coming back and doing a one-off special, or is that sort of…?

MS: No, I don’t think I want to bother with that. Besides, the super suit is getting a little tight around the middle!

Me: Is there anything you miss about broadcasting or Northeast Ohio?

MS: Well, I miss Northeast Ohio. I don’t really miss broadcasting. It was a great run while I had it, but that’s over with. I do miss the people in Northeast Ohio. I mean, they’re just the salt of the earth. They were very faithful to me the whole 20 years I was on television. They were supportive, and friendly, and that applies to everybody in Northeast Ohio.

Me: Well, there’s lots of people that still admire you. You’ve still got a ton of fans here that are grateful, thankful for everything that you did. You’re still very much admired!

MS: Well thank you very much! That’s very kind of you!

Me: Well, thank you very, very much. I can’t tell you how really amazing it has been to talk with you. What a huge, huge thrill it was for me!

MS: Well God Bless you! Thank you!

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What an honor it was to speak with a genuine Northeast Ohio television legend. I can’t thank Mr. Sullivan enough for taking the time to speak with me. I know I speak for countless other Northeast Ohioans when I say “Thanks for all the laughs, Supe!”

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Two Nice Finds at Goodwill Tonight.

Finally, finally, after a semi-long hiatus, some Goodwill finds that warrant a special post, on the same night I found them, no less. A trip to the State Road Goodwill tonight resulted in one “great” find and one “oh hell yes” find. Now, I have better luck at this particular Goodwill than I do at the Midway Plaza one (though to be fair, I visit that one less frequently), and I almost always find at least one thing, be it a book (Heaven help you if you try to take a Robert B. Parker away from me) or a VHS tape I don’t mind pissing a dollar away on. Unfortunately, it’s been several months since I’ve found a really decent VCR or other electronic device there to spotlight, though my recent purchase of a Kodak 8000 Disc camera is a candidate for a future post. As much as I love that obsolete camera, though, it just can’t compare to tonight’s finds.

Read the last paragraph of this post, and perhaps you’ll understand why I was so jazzed to come across this first item. Please ignore the fact I chose to photograph it in the messiest spot in the universe.

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A 60th anniversary roaring box edition of King Kong! Only cost $1! I’ve been hoping to come across one of these “in the wild” for years! And even better, it’s the more-scarce colorized edition! I came close, several times, to pulling the trigger on Ebay for regular black & white editions, but for whatever reason, didn’t. Fears of the now-ancient battery that powers the chest leaking certainly played a part in that. Anyway, I’m not sure why it’s taken me so long to find a roaring box King Kong in person, they’re apparently not particularly rare, but no joke, this is the first one I’ve ever come across while out and about. Anyone watching me as I snapped it off the shelf was probably like “really?” but I don’t care.

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Yep, colorized, from when that dubious enhancement was seen as a necessary alternative to the ‘real’ black & white version. Unless they just announced something I wasn’t paying attention to, outside of pirated versions made from old Laserdiscs or what have you, this edition of King Kong isn’t available on DVD in the U.S. It goes without saying I prefer seeing the film in black & white as intended, but I will say as far as the colorization of King Kong goes, well, I’ve seen worse.

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Now over 20 years old and against all odds, the roaring feature actually still works! Maybe not all that well; it seems fairly quiet, but it’s more than I would have expected. I would have bought this tape even if it didn’t roar, but it still functioning is a nice bonus.

As much as a I love my King Kong thing, the real winner of Goodwill tonight is what’s coming up next. It seems that someone donated a whole lot of mid-1970’s to early-1980’s toys, and believe me when I say these are the kinds of things you just don’t see at Goodwill on a regular basis. Certainly not at the ones around me. Nearly as soon as I walked in, I was seeing all kinds of ancient stuff: kiddie pinball machines, any number of race car toys/tracks, board games, even some kind of space station thing. And just when I thought I had seen it all, I’d come across something else I’d missed.

It’s the kind of thing that can lead to massive impulse buying, and you’d better believe I was scooping up so many items that my cart was overflowing. I never intended on buying every single one of them, but no one would dare violate the unspoken rule of taken something out of someone’s cart. (Would they?) I just had to safeguard them until I had a chance to go through the lot and see what was worth buying and what wasn’t.

Unfortunately, pretty much everything was incomplete, sometimes seriously so. The ones that used batteries and whatnot may or may not have worked. In the end, I ended up buying only one thing, something I knew I was going home with the second my eyes fell on it. You know how I sometimes state that I’d fight an old lady for ____________ should I come across ____________ at a yard sale/thrift store/etc.? This is one of those items:

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The Mini Monster Play Case from Remco’s 1980 line of Universal Monster figures?! Oh hell yes I’m buying it and you can’t stop me. I may have snapped King Kong up fast, but my grabbing of this was something more akin to Bruce Lee. We’re talking lightnin’ quick moves here. Keep going lady, this one’s mines. I’m not sure if everyone (anyone?) can relate to this, but this was one of those times where you’re so excited about finding something, that immediately you get insanely protective of it, as if someone will try to take it away from you. I’m not kidding, I think the last time I got like that in this Goodwill was when I found an incomplete M*A*S*H Vodka dispenser a couple summers ago.

I knew when I looked inside that it wasn’t remotely complete. Honestly, I didn’t care. Even if this was the case alone, nothing inside, no accessories whatsoever, I was buying it, because I love the Universal Monsters just that much. The case may not have been complete, but there was something even better inside…

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Four of the six Universal Monster figures from this line! There’s The Gill Man, Dracula, The Mummy, and The Phantom Of The Opera, all in really nice shape. Only Frankenstein and The Wolf Man are missing.

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Actually, when I found all this, The Phantom was laying outside of the case and with his cape off. Since the chances of him being in this Goodwill and not coming with this set are less than zilch, I returned him to his rightful place with the other three, but it’s clear someone must have been looking at this before I got there. I wonder if there were Frankenstein and Wolf Man figs that someone bought separately? Keep in mind, the case originally didn’t come with any figures back in 1980, so the original owner may have had only the ones seen above. I certainly looked all over for any further displaced figures, but no luck. Not that I’m complaining, because I didn’t have any of them, and I totally would have been happy with just The Gill Man and/or Dracula. As far as I’m concerned, The Phantom and The Mummy are just nice bonuses.

Just like King Kong, there were times in the past where I came close to buying some of these figures on Ebay, but backed off because the price was just a bit too high for my tastes. I sure as hell can’t complain about the price here, because the entire set cost me three damn dollars! The figures alone, especially in this nice of shape, are worth waaay more than $3 apiece, never mind four of them together in a very good condition (albeit incomplete) Monster case.

Yep, miracles can still happen at Goodwill, you just gotta be in the right place at the right time. I don’t know when all this stuff went out on the floor or what was bought before I walked in the door, but damn dude, I couldn’t be happier with what I did get.

All that and Son of Ghoul was brand new tonight. Today has been a good day.

Pioneer Laserdisc Player Model No. LD-V6000A (1989)

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Found, forgotten and dusty in an oft-overlooked secret alcove of Time Traveler last night, my good pal Scott straight up gave me this incredible beast: A Pioneer Laserdisc player, model number LD-V6000A from 1989. Such are the perks of kinda sorta working there. It’s admittedly not in sell-able condition (I’ll show why in a moment), or I would have cleaned it up, slapped a price tag on it and put it out for the world to admire. Lord knows I don’t need another Laserdisc player, but this is the exact kind of electronic I’m a sucker for.

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The remote is loooong gone, and there doesn’t seem to be any way to fast-forward or rewind from the unit itself. I’d think those would be standard features for a player manufactured as late as 1989, but hell, I don’t know. Compared to VHS and Betamax VCRs, I don’t quite know the history of Laserdisc players as backwards and forwards as I probably should. Which is puzzling, because I’ve got mounds of useless information on pretty much everything else.

A quick internet search on the LD-V6000A brings up multiple mentions of it being an “industrial unit.” Is that a code word for “enormous SOB?” Because that’s what this thing is. Granted, Laserdisc players were never the smallest things in the world, but compared to my other LD units, this guy is somewhat bigger and considerably heavier, undoubtedly because those are consumer models. There go my hopes of using the LD-V6000A as a kite. It’s not as hernia-inducing as my stupid Quasar VCR, but it’s certainly not something you’d want to juggle, either (supposing you were interested in having the world’s most-moronic circus act, that is.)

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See, manufactured in 1989! Did you think I was lying? I wasn’t.

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Somehow I didn’t notice the mention of “industrial” on the back until I was looking at this picture. How did I miss that? I should pay more attention to these things. So, what exactly constitutes an “industrial” Laserdisc player? Is it all the additional doo-dads on the back, heavier casing, A cord you’d need bolt cutters in order to sever? I assume this sort of thing was generally more available to businesses and schools, as opposed to what you could buy at your local electronics store? This is new territory for me, so please explain with patience and understanding, kindly reader.

(That last sentence just may be the most idiotic thing I’ve ever written on this blog, and that’s coming from a guy that inserted an awkward, Adam West Batman-style cliffhanger in the middle of his Death Drug review.)

Cosmetically, the LD-V6000A isn’t in bad shape at all. A little cleaning and this sucker would be loaded, cocked and ready to rock. So, why wasn’t it suitable to be placed before a hungry public that you just know would be fighting tooth and nail over it?

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Because upon pressing the appropriate button, the damn disc tray refuses to slide out. Now, I’ve had plenty of vintage electronics with motorized disc trays that nowadays require a little prompting on the user’s part to get movin’. It comes with the territory, and indeed, my second Laserdisc player (which was also my first actual working one) needed a little help to get going in that area. So, the fact that the LD-V6000A’s motorized disc tray isn’t operating at optimal performance isn’t that big of a detriment. A little prying should do the trick…

…Except that isn’t remotely enough. Nope, this disc tray won’t come out for anyone or anything. I mean, it really doesn’t want to work. Something in the mechanism must be full-on broken.

It’ll be a cold day in hell before I let a mere Laserdisc player dictate what I can and can’t do. So…

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Throwing caution to the wind, I yanked on the tray with all mah might, negligible though my strength may be. And I tell ya, you’ve got to REALLY pull on the tray door before it’ll give up the ghost. Nevertheless, from the picture above, you can see I was successful. Me: 1, LD: 0. Makes me feel like a big man.

In all fairness, I knew all this before I even brought the thing home. We tried it out in the store, ripped the tray out of it’s residence, and so on and so on. And we did put an LD in it, and it did indeed sound as if it ran. So, taxation of my muscles aside, that was a good sign, I guess. Then again, you never really know for sure until you hook it up proper.

The problem there is that I don’t have the right cables to hook it up proper. Scroll back up and look at that pic of the back of the unit. I have AV cables for the audio outputs, but the picture output doesn’t use those. I wasn’t prepared to invest any more time or effort in this thing other than what was immediately available to me. So, I plugged the audio cables into the front of my VCR, figuring that if I heard sound, I’d call it a success.

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There was a good chance that even if the player didn’t work properly beforehand, the sweet, sweet voice of Phil Collins would snap it back into shape right quick. Ideally, I would have busted out my Bruce Springsteen Video Anthology 1978-1988 disc for this purpose, but that would have required back-breakin’ disc diggin’, and my interest in this whole thing was waning far too seriously for that.

Against all odds (get it?! BWAHAWHAWHAW!!!) and to the shock of millions dozens, I did indeed hear the appropriate sounds one would expect from a live Phil Collins Laserdisc. True, I couldn’t see the picture, but it didn’t sound like it was skipping or anything. Cautiously, I’ll file this one under “Workin’, yo.” I’d have never expected it to work, especially considering the motorized tray is all kinds of out-o’-order, but I guess it wasn’t an industrial strength LD player for nothing, huh?

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There it be. It’s kind of a regal beast, ain’t it? Well, maybe “regal” isn’t the right description. I think “imposing” fits better. And what’s more imposing than a Laserdisc player that could easily flatten a car? I think next heavy snow, I’ll find a hill and use this thing as a sled. I’ll be the envy of all…?

Off in the distance, you’ll notice a portrait of Elvis, his visage watching over the LD-V6000A. It’s his birthday today, you know. I promise you I didn’t plan it that way, either. Twas just a happy coincidence.